Arthur and Buster Get Stood Up

(Muffy and Francine enter stage left. They walk to center stage, a high school hallway.)

Muffy: Finally, after all these years...

Francine: ...in Mr. Ragburp's 4th grade class...

Muffy: ...we're in our senior year of high school...

Francine: ...and it's time for the prom.

(Muffy and Francine exit stage left and then Arthur and Buster enter
stage right.)

Arthur: Hey, Buster, who do you think I should ask to the prom?

Buster: Do you need to ask that? You've had the hots for
Francine since the 4th grade!

Arthur: Yeah. But she doesn't like me. I think she likes the Brain. He's much smarter than me and wears better cologne.

Buster: Dude, don't put yourself down like that. You are much smarter than him. Well, maybe not smarter but you definitely wear better cologne. I've smelled it - essence of toad turds.

Arthur: Cut it out, Buster! Who are you asking to the prom? Prunella?

Buster: Oh sick! Arthur! I like... I like... um... um... I won't tell you.

Arthur: If you don't tell me I'm gonna tell Mr. Stiffshit that you skipped his class yesterday to play hooky.

Buster: Yikes! Ok ok I'll tell you! But it's embarrassing so don't laugh!

Arthur: It can't be that embarrassing unless it really is Prunella.

Buster: Oh shut up!

Arthur: Fine just tell me!

Buster: Ok, but don't tell anyone.

Arthur: Fine, now just tell me!

Buster: Alright here it goes. I like um um Mm-Mm- Muffy.

Arthur: Holy shit, Buster, you like Muffy?!

Buster: Shhhh... not so loud!

Arthur: Dude, I thought you liked Sue!

Buster: Why would you think that?

Arthur: Because you always hang around her.

Buster: Arthur, you sick puppy, Sue is my cousin!

Arthur: Ohhhh oops hee hee. Well, anyway I think we should ask them at lunch.

Buster: Them who?

Arthur: Muffy and Francine, you dip!

Buster: Ohh, ok, at lunch.

Arthur: Alright and then... Wait! There they are now! Let's go for it!

Buster: Alrighty, Arthur, after you, ladies first!

Arthur: Well at least I'm brave enough, Buster.

Buster: (charging forward, not to be outdone, runs into Muffy, knocks her down, landing on top of her, and blurts out) "Muffy, will you go to the prom with me?"

Muffy: Sorry, spazo, someone already asked me, someone who didn’t have to jump on me to ask. Now would you mind getting off me?

Buster: Yeah, sorry. (shoulders drooping, walks past Arthur and off stage right) Good luck, good buddy.

Arthur: (walks up to Francine) Francine, will you go to the prom with me?

Francine: Sorry, Arthur, someone already asked me.

Arthur: Awwww, man! You too? Who got to you first?

Francine: Ummm…the Brain.

Arthur: Man, I knew it!

Francine: Oh, and Arthur?

Arthur: Yeah, Francine?Francine: Your fly is down.

(Arthur runs crying off stage right.)

Francine: Whoa, that was close. We’re alone now.

Muffy: Why do we have to keep this a secret? I can't take it anymore!

Francine: Well me either! You don't think I'm not upset about us
having to plan our prom in the janitor's closet! Huh?!

Muffy: No, of course not! It's just that I hate the fact that we can't have a happy relationship because of a new president!

Francine: Yah! I know. I hate that Dick Chaney guy!

Muffy: Totally! He's such a prick!

Francine: Yah! Why is he sooo offended about two people of the same sex having a relationship?

Muffy: Yah! I mean what's the big deal?

Francine: If he knew we were going out he would make us break up.

Muffy: I wouldn't be able to live without you!

Francine: That's so sweet Muffy! I wouldn't be able to live without you either. You're the first person I think of when I wake up in the morning and the last person I think about before I go to sleep.

Muffy: I feel the same way. I think about you all day long.
When Buster asked me to the prom all I could think about was you. And how much of a giant bruise I’m going to have on my ass.

Francine: I felt the same way when Arthur asked me.

Muffy: I'm so lucky I found you! Now I what true happiness is.

Francine: I get all tingly just thinking about you.

Muffy: Well, babe. You give me goose bumps. (bring, bring, bring)

Francine: Well, that's the bell. Let’s go to lunch, honey.

(Muffy and Francine exit stage left.)

(All characters return to stage: Buster and Arthur from stage right holding hands and Muffy and Francine from stage left holding hands.)

All: But don’t worry, we all lived happily every after. We all found our true loves. (Muffy and Francine kiss and Buster and Arthur kiss.)

THE END

Muffy and Francine's Dialogue without Saying I Love You

Muffy: Why do we have to keep this a secret? I can't take it anymore!

Francine: Well me either! You don't think I'm not upset about us having to plan our prom in the janitor's closet! Huh?!

Muffy: No, of course not! It's just that I hate the fact that we can'thave a happy relationship because of a new president!

Francine: Yah! I know. I hate that Dick Chaney guy!

Muffy: Totally! He's such a prick!

Francine: Yah! Why is he sooo offended about two people of the same sex having a relationship?

Muffy: Yah! I mean what's the big deal?

Francine: If he knew we were going out he would make us break up.

Muffy: I wouldn't be able to live without you!

Francine: That's so sweet Muffy! I wouldn't be able to live without you either. You're the first person I think of when I wake up in themorning and the last person I think about before I go to sleep.

Muffy: I feel the same way. I think about you all day long.When Buster asked me to the prom all I could think about was you.

Francine: I felt the same way when Arthur asked me.

Muffy: I'm so lucky I found you! Now I what true happiness is.

Francine: I get all tingly just thinking about you.

Muffy: Well, babe. you give me gose bumps. (bring,bring,bring)

Francine: Well, that's the bell. I'll see you at lunch, honey.

Muffy: Bye, sweety! (Muffy & Francine blow kisses)